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PRINCIPLES: ADDICTION & RECOVERY TIPS & TALKS
        Vol.1, No.20                  September 22, 2000
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=====TABLE OF CONTENTS=====

=====EDITOR'S COMMENTS
=====READERS' TWO CENTS' WORTH
=====THINGS YOU ALREADY KNEW, BUT...
=====TIP & TALK FEATURE ARTICLE
=====SPONSOR'S SPIEL
=====AN EASTERN PERSPECTIVE ON RECOVERY
=====FEATURED LINK OF THE WEEK
=====PURE BOLOGNA & HOGWASH
=====SUBSCRIBE / UNSUBSCRIBE / COMMENT


=====EDITOR'S COMMENTS=====

PUBLICATION: Principles: Addiction & Recovery Tips &
Talks is published every Friday morning by Charles
Roper, the owner & author of Alcohol & Drug Abuse -
The Addiction & Recovery Information & Resources
Web site. Please pay the site a visit.
http://alcoholanddrugabuse.com

DISTRIBUTION: Principles is distributed only to
subscribers. If you have received this newsletter by
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UNSUBSCRIBE instructions at the bottom of this page.

PRIVACY: I will NEVER publish, give, loan, or sell your
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Thanks...Charles Roper


=====READER'S TWO CENTS' WORTH=====

Thanks for all of your feedback. I appreciate all of
it. Well...almost all. There was one that kind of hurt,
but hey...I did ask for it.

I'll get this section up and running next week.


=====THINGS YOU ALREADY KNEW, BUT...=====

Learn from the mistakes of others.
You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
--Eleanor Roosevelt--


=====TIP & TALK FEATURED ARTICLE=====

RECOVERY TIP: Take your time...be patient..with recovery; it's a process that lasts a lifetime, and you're entitled to make many, many dumb mistakes.

RECOVERY TIP TALK: When Jesse hit his first AA meeting, he fit perfectly one of the better descriptions of an alcoholic. He was truly an egomaniac with an inferiority complex.

As such, Jesse quickly developed two primary goals for himself. The first was to look and sound as good as he possibly could so that no one would know how confused and afraid he felt. The second was to hurry up and skip over early recovery confusion and fear so that he could take his rightful place at the head of the recovery table.

Jesse listened closely at meetings and made mental notes about how to achieve his goals. He quickly read the Big Book a couple of times, memorized the parts that sounded good, and rehearsed "speaking in meetings" so that when the time came, he could sound both spontaneous and learned beyond his time in the program.

He picked a popular sponsor--a woman--with a reputation for leniency, and he flew through the steps like a man possessed--which of course is exactly what he was. He fibbed about attending 90 meetings in 90 days, but he did attend a lot of meetings, during which he quoted not only the Big Book but also the 12 & 12, As Bill Sees It, Living Sober, and Codependent No More. He was a damn inspiration to newcomers and old-timers alike.

People in Jesse's home group clapped him on the back and told him how great he was doing and how terrific he sounded. Jesse smiled and thanked them all for pointing out the obvious.

Strange things started happening right around the time Jesse picked up his six-month sobriety chip. He began losing sleep. He started feeling depressed. He quit answering his telephone. His appetite for sweets ballooned, and he binged on ice cream. He lost his enthusiasm for meetings. And before long, he started fantasizing about what it would feel like to get high.

A couple of people thought they noticed something different, and they asked Jesse about it. But Jesse found himself unable to acknowledge, let alone discuss, what was happening. In order to protect himself, he had built his sobriety on image, and he couldn't bring himself to risk destroying what he had so care-fully crafted. So he lied. He promised everyone that he was fine, and he doubled his efforts to look good.

I'd like to tell you that Jesse turned things around, got
honest, acknowledged his pain, and stayed sober. But that wouldn't be the truth. Jesse didn't make it. He continued to attend AA meetings for awhile. He smiled and talked the talk until someone publicly called his bluff. It was more than he could stand. He dropped out of AA, and not long after that, started drinking again.

Was it pride? Perhaps it was shame? I don't know; maybe they're the same thing. I do know this, though: To experience recovery, we have to find genuineness, even when it means looking foolish.


=====SPONSOR'S SPIEL=====

High Bottom Drunk: A Novel...and the Truth about Addiction & Recovery, by Charles N. Roper, PhD.

Please take a moment to check it out:
http://www.highbottomdrunk.com


=====EASTERN PERSPECTIVE ON RECOVERY=====

In Zen, the concept of "Higher Power" is rarely defined or given human attributes. The question is left open as basically irrelevant to what is happening here and now. Zen asserts that we are inseparable from the universal mind and that we exist in an eternal now. Heaven and Nirvana are no different from where we find ourselves at this instant. Only our diseased, conditioned minds think otherwise. We are already enlightened, redeemed and saved. Once we reawaken to our fundamental nature, this becomes clear.

Paraphrased from: The Zen of Recovery, by Mel Ash.


=====LINK OF THE WEEK=====

This week's featured link is: The StoryBin: An Internet
Collection of Stories and Parables for Positive Living.

This Web site is a beautiful piece of work, packed full of original pieces as well as hundreds of contributions from readers from all around the world. And if you search around, you'll find many pages devoted to recovery.

Visit the site at:
http://www.storybin.com


=====PURE BOLOGNA & HOGWASH=====

This one has been around for a long time, which makes it an oldie but a goodie.

An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of beer, and sits in the back of the room drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.

The bartender tells him, "You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it. They would taste better if you bought one at a time."

The Irishman replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other in Australia, and I'm here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together."

The bartender admits that this is a nice custom and merrily goes on with his business.

The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and he drinks the same way every time he comes in. One day, though, he orders only two pints. All the other regulars notice and fall silent, certain that the Irishman had lost one of his brothers.

When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, sir, but I want to offer my condolences on your great loss."

The Irishman looks confused for a moment, and then it occurs to him what's happening. "Oh, no," he says. "Everyone's fine. I've just quit drinking."


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Till next week...do us all a favor and keep it simple.

Charles Roper, Editor
Principles: Addiction & Recovery Tips & Talks

Alcohol & Drug Abuse - The Addiction & Recovery Information & Resources Web site:
http://www.alcoholanddrugabuse.com